If you come from stereotypical Caribbean culture, AND you’re trying to date in the current market of NYC, the odds don’t look too good for you.

But we’re your hope that it’s possible.

What you hear in that video is a million thoughts, unadulterated joy, crack-like nerves, and a sprinkle of undiagnosed autism, trying to tell Daina every single detail of how I was finally able to pull off a surprise on her.

Letting her know all the tricks, you know? So I can never succeed at surprising her again.

But at least I successfully pulled off a big one!

Throughout this journey I faced a lot challenges. Just the righhht amount of struggle, just the righhht amount of hurdle, just the righht amount of tussle, to test how determined I really was to make this happen.

But there was also just the righhht amount of coincidental sequences. And I say coincidental very lightly. Because as I said in my gibberish cadence above, God was with me.

And I was documenting it every step of the way.

I bought the ring on April 3rd and I proposed on May 9th.

This is the story on what happened in-between.

GOOOOD Friday, April 3rd

I bought the ring, duhh. But let me tell you what a nightmare that was.

I was supposed to meet my cousin, Felix Santana, in the city. He just proposed to his fiancée the month before, and had a connection with a well-renowned jeweler.

My mom went into the hospital for heart surgery that morning. I was unsure how it would go.

Then I left my siblings unattended to get a haircut for forty minutes. They’re not toddlers, I just want to preface that. The two youngest are fifteen-year-old twins and my sister is twenty-three.

So what could go wrong?

Nothing, I thought.

When I got back from my fresh lineup you wouldn’t believe what was waiting for me.

Floodwaters. Superfluously drooling out the marble bowl, from the room that was not giving rest.

Turds sliding across the floor like it was an ice skating rink.

Turdy water in my room, turdy water in my sister’s room, turdy water in my mom’s room, turdy water in my brothers’ room, turdy water in the kitchen, and everyone was sitting around, like turdy water was part of the house decor.

I immediately lost my mind and berated my siblings in every metaphor conjurable.

I’m not proud of this. However, my eyes could only see Muddy Butty Buffoons in the moment.

The time I had to shower after my haircut was now non-existent. I had to unclog the toilet and abate the flood faster than the time God remembered Noah.

I was overwhelmed and I was this close 🤏🏽 to telling Felix I’m no longer meeting up with him.

Then I had a realization:

I couldn’t tell Felix I was no longer going. Because this was probably the only day where I was off of work, Felix was free, and I had a solid story to go into the city without suspicion, while Daina was also distracted at work.

All our busy schedules encompassed, this spaghetti junction never happens. The stars were all aligned for this moment.

I didn’t have to lie or make up a tale. I could say I was helping Felix create content by Grand Central before I hopped on the Metro North to meet up with her… because that’s exactly what I was doing.

Thankfully, Diamond District is not too far. I could conveniently not mention the extra part where I bought a ring in the midst of vlogging.

Daina and I share locations which is why the story on where I was located needed to check out.

I knew this was God paving the lane for me, holding my hand as I walked a tightrope, with pants at my ankles.

There was just the righhhht amount of tension where I felt like I was being asked, how much do you actually want this? Just the righht amount of synchronicity where I felt like I was being told, the time is now.

Needless to say, I unclogged the toilet, never got to shower, bought the ring (with hair all over my face), dropped it off at my house, met up with Daina to do our nails in Mt. Vernon, no problem.

Completely undetected.

Paved Path, April 16th

Planning the proposal costed me a lot more than I was anticipating. I don’t want to give out exact numbers because I find that to be taboo. Ultimately it’s the effort and thought we should be microscoped on.

But you can guestimate. You’ve seen the the ring, it’s blinding. Plus, I booked a semi-private three course meal for 19+ people, a photographer, upgraded my technological equipment to best capture the moment, and I even bought clothes for Daina and myself in the weeks leading up (to ensure she had new dresses to choose from).

The only reason I mention these expenses is because the proposal was something I imagined being low cost. Not sure why I imagined that because I knew what my plan was wayyyyy before I bought the ring. I should’ve saw the bill from miles away.

But in a perfect world, my brain envisioned the bigger bucks being spent on the wedding, honeymoon, and moving into a new place.

So my high spending in the proposal process did make me a bit wary.

Then, on April 16th, The Balloon Benders got reached out to by a big client, a professional sports team, which put us on their “preferred vendors” rotation.

The deal didn’t fall through due to weather conditions, and the event coordinator needing to pivot plans.

But it felt like the Lord was telling me,

“See. You took the first step on faith, when circumstances around you weren’t convenient, not having everything mapped out the way your brain tried to map things out. Now I’m going to pave new lanes you didn’t see coming.“

Russians, April 28th

Daina developed an unnatural proclivity with needing a Russian manicure, seemingly out of nowhere.

I still need to go visit the nail salon and see what this Russian looks like. Ain’t no way my girl is this giddy about some nail polish.

Hmphh.

Anyway, this infatuation was convenient for me because Daina always told me whenever I decided to propose I needed to make sure her nails and hair was done.

Only caveat was, she wanted to do her Russian manicure on April 28th at 11am, which I was wary would be too far in advance of May 9th.

But on April 28th the nail lady canceled Daina’s appointment because a family member had a stroke. That pushed the appointment to the next day, April 29th at 5pm.

This gave us an extra day and a half — putting us closer to the one week range of May 9th, further ensuring potential nail freshness.

Don’t get me wrong, I hope the nail tech’s family member is doing well. I’m sure she is because Daina didn’t have any bad news to share when she got back from her appointment the next day.

But what are the odds that the timing of everything panned out in my favor?

Maybe that’s a coincidence. But how many coincidences does someone stack together before they start to question the likelihood that it’s mere happenstance?

Because The Big Bang also coincidentally gave us a perfectly fine-tuned earth through a single-celled organism in a process of entropy.

Anyway, I digress.

Keep reading.

My Last Paycheck, May 1st

My last check right before the proposal, I got paid the highest paycheck I’ve ever been paid at work.

I generally get OT opportunities here and there. But not as many as the two weeks leading up to this check. I did over 100 hours of work in two weeks. That’s twenty hours of OT!

I made about $400 more than I normally see. That was the exact tip money for all my vendors.

The Phone Call, May 1st

I called Daina’s parents to tell them about the proposal and ask for their blessing. The call was scheduled for 6:30pm.

I normally get off work at 4pm, but I got asked to stay back ’til 6pm this day, giving me the perfect alibi for not being able to talk to Daina yet (we sometimes hop on the phone as soon as I’m home).

The train got me home the fastest it’s ever gotten me. I was at 103rd st (one stop before my actual stop) by 6:28pm.

I walked from there to speak to the Jameisons on the phone.

I was afraid I would be stuttering and nervous when speaking. But the Lord gave me a calmness, a sound mind, and a confidence that doesn’t overcome me that often — I spoke clearly.

Mr. Jameison’s response was, “Anything that gets her out the house faster.” 😂

“Baby Sprinkle” CANCELED, May 2nd

The plan originally wasn’t a typical “all girls brunch”. This was supposed to be a “Baby Sprinkle brunch” for one of our close friends and business coach, soon-to-be mom (at the time), Carolina.

BUT BABY R. DECIDED TO COME EARLY AND DERAIL THE WHOLE PLAN.

She was due to come out late June and early July. Hence why I booked the proposal on May 9th in the first place. I wanted to schedule it far enough from the due date to prevent this. However, Baby R. couldn’t wait to meet us and came out sooner.

And this is what blew my mind, less than 24 hours after giving birth, while I’m planning my plan B, C, and D, Francisco and Carolina text me to let me know they can still do the brunch.

That did not make sense. The fact that I was even a thought on their mind while they are in the midst of welcoming a premature baby. And the fact that Caro was insistent she would be at 100% within the next 7 days to be at the proposal.

I couldn’t believe it. Even as I’m typing, after everything has unfolded, I’m still in disbelief.

They honestly don’t make friends like Francisco & Carolina now-a-days. I don’t know what good I’ve done in my life to be blessed with a rarity like them.

SO THE PLAN BARELY CHANGED.

We pivoted by Caro telling the girls the restaurant was already booked, NON-REFUNDABLE DEPOSIT WAS PLACED IN ADVANCE, SO LET’S HAVE THE BRUNCH ANYWAY!!!

Instead of “Baby Sprinkle” it was now “Baby Welcome”.

The Sus Phone Call, May 2nd

My best friends, Winiver and Angie finally found out from Caro the “all girls brunch” was actually a surprise proposal.

They got really excited and called me.

Only problem was, I was with Daina.

They started acting really suspicious, stuttering, asking if Daina was around, then hanging up shortly after.

If this was a circus show we were the three highest paid clowns in the tent.

Daina was right beside me the whole time.

We were in a quiet room, so she could hear the whole call even though it wasn’t on speaker.

I was sure I was cooked. Because how is that even explainable? Why would my friends call me, ask if Daina was there, tell me they were calling for nothing important, they will call me later, and then hang up?

Either we’re planning to rob a bank, or setup a surprise proposal. There’s no in-between.

Winiver texted me right after. I was praying the text wasn’t incriminating because me and Daina were now getting to the bottom of their suspicious behavior, and reading the texts together.

The text was this:

As soon as I saw this Hail Mary, this is the story I leveraged. This immediately alleviated me from being an accomplice in Winiver and Angie’s sus-ness.

Before that, Daina was starting to look at me like I was an accomplice in whatever tomfoolery they were concocting.

I mean, I was, but that’s not the point.

Winiver and Angie calling me to ask about surprising Daina with being a bridesmaid was still odd, but it gave me something to work with.

I Called Winiver Back, May 3rd

I called first thing in the morning, and I found out Win and Angie were genuinely calling to surprise Daina about being a bridesmaid, AND to talk about the proposal. At first I thought the “bridesmaid” suggestion was a subterfuge created to dig themselves out of the hole they put us all in.

Thank God they had an ACTUAL surprise outside of talking to me about the proposal. Because this explained away the SUS phone call.

AND THIS IS THE MOMENT I STEPPED BACK TO NOTICE GOD HAS HAD THE FUNNIEST SENSE OF HUMOR THROUGHOUT ALL THIS. HE WAS DEMONSTRATING THAT HE IS TRULY OMNITEMPORAL. BECAUSE TIMING HAS BEEN NOTHING BUT PRECISE AT EVERY JUNCTURE. NOTHING BUT AN INSTRUMENT TO HIM.

Now this whole ordeal threw another monkey wrench into Daina’s mind, if she was ever getting suspicious of me to begin with.

I Must Be Really Predictable, May 5th

I can’t even take a forty minute detour right after work without Daina noticing my behavior is off. I ran to B&H (two blocks from my job) to get an extra battery for my camera, which was being used at the proposal. Daina texts me at 4:44pm to ask why am I still at the office? She knows I clock out at 4pm, and go straight home when I have nothing planned 😔.

Thankfully, it was Cinco De Mayo. I told her I’m Mexican and I was having a few tacos. That was enough to get the heat off of me.

I felt extremely bad for lying though.

This is the one time I did not have an alibi for what I was doing. I needed to lie. I still feel dirty thinking about it. YUCK.

The Zoom Call, May 7th

Thursday, two days out.

I had a Zoom call with everyone who’s attending the “girl’s brunch” turned proposal at 9pm. Which is the time I would normally be on the phone with Daina for the rest of the night.

Somehow by the grace of God Daina decided to take a nap around 7pm and didn’t wake up ’til 9:38pm.

This has rarely ever happened. I’m usually the napper. What are the odds she needed a nap on the day I needed to do an undercover Zoom call? And then she wakes up AFTER my call is over.

I didn’t have to come up with a story, or make up a weird reason for why I couldn’t be on the phone. Thank God, because my heart could not take it. I was still recovering from the Cinco De Mayo lie.

“New Beginnings”, May 4th & May 8th

I saw two fires the week of the proposal. On Monday, May 4th, there was a car on fire on the highway on my way to work.

Friday, May 8th, I saw a huge fire happening in NJ from my office window.

A few months ago Daina and I both had dreams, within a few days of each other, that our apartments were on fire.

Daina’s interpretation was that fires can symbolize “new beginnings”. That God had “new beginnings” in store for us.

Is it poetic to start the beginning of this specific week with a symbolic “new beginning”, then the end of the week, the day before I propose, with another “new beginning”?

The Big Day, May 9th

View this post on Instagram

All roads lead to this moment.

I didn’t realize this last miracle right away. My mind was on a lot of things this morning. You’ll see everything I was up to in the vlog below.

But I got this realization on the train ride to the restaurant:

I had three cold sores in my mouth the whole week. They were HUGE. I even remember feeling them right before I went to sleep.

I believe my cold sores came from my change in diet. I had been fasting and praying everyday for two weeks, and not hydrating as much as I should’ve.

But on May 9th I woke up and all the cold sores were gone!

Which means I was ready to smooch her :)

The Vlog

For those of you who scrolled past the entire article just to see the video, understand you need professional help. Your attention span is fried like the calamari I served Daina in the clip.

But I still appreciate you.

I documented the entire day of May 9th leading up to the proposal.

Enjoy the mini movie at the link below.

I Disguised Myself As A Chef To Propose: Full Vlog